Looney Hearts
by Bugsy-Lapin
Summary: A Looney Tuned version of KH!
1. Chapter 1

_Prologue:_

_(Bugs, Daffy, Lola and her bodyguards are walking and talking in the castle grounds, when they see Something moving in the distance)._

_Listen, Lo, I know this feeling's been bothering you for a while, but there's nothing... (Bugs' sleeve is tugged on by one Lola Bodyguards) What? (points towards black mass in the distance)_

_when seeing Something: _

_Something's not right... C'mon Daff, gotta check it out. _

_You two, protect the Queen, alright? Keep her safe._

_Player gains control. If they look at Bugs' inventory, they notice the Wolpertinger Keyblade equipped, and the Imperial Armlet and Titanium Bangle as accessories. _

_Looking at Daffy's, they see the Feathery Fiend wand equipped, and the Shaman's Mark and Imperial Armlet equipped._

_Player runs down hallway a short time before they run into a large mass of Somethings, also known as Heartless!_

_First fight:_

_(Fight is timed, 3 minutes against endless waves of Heartless, objective is to prevent Heartless from passing.)_

_You aren't going anywhere bub!_

_Hey Daff, got any idea what these are?_

_You're not getting past me!_

_Using Fira: Feel the burn!_

_Using Blizzaga: Chill, mac!_

_Using any of the "En" spells: This'll help!/ A little boost..._

_Using Cura/Cure/Curaga: (on himself): Gotta hold on..., (on Daffy): C'mon Daff!_

_Using Aeroga: Stay still!_

_When blocking/dodging an attack: Missed me!_

_When slaying an enemy: *laughs*/ C'mon, C'mon!_

_(At one minute mark)_

_Can't be many more...right?_

_(TIme elapses,Giant Heartless appears)_

_Run!_

_Player is K.O'd _

_Bugs' Prologue is over._


	2. Chapter 2

_ 10 minutes later_

_The _car stopped at the light.Bugslooked over at Lola, who was still pouting in the passenger seat, arms tightly folded. "So," he said, "You still mad at me for the whole 'Honey' thing?" Lola glanced over at him, eyebrows raised.

"Do you think I'm still mad?" she asked. "I'm the one that ended up marrying you, nor her." "Yeah, I think the ring makes dat clear," said Bugs, pointing at the very, very, expensive rings on both their fingers. "It's better dhan anything Honey could afford now, that's for sure. I don't think _**cleaning lady**_ is a job that rakes in the cash, Lo." She started laughing, and the tension broke.

The light changed, and they turned into the parking lot.

"So what are we doing today?" asked Lola. Bugs thought for a second, and said "Propaganda Cartoon. Tony wants us to ease the minds of the people, make 'em think we got the enemy on the run, which shouldn't be too hard now that we got Alaska back. Cakewalk, Lo." "We got Alaska back?" She perked up in surprise. "Wow, maybe now we can all relax." "I don't think so, love," said Bugs, " nothing on the news about the war being over, yet." Bugs parked into his slot near the front of the building, and noticed trucks parked outside the building with VAULT-TEC emblazoned on the side.

_What's going on?, he wondered._


	3. Chapter 3

_"So... Plan B, Folks?"_

Everyone glanced at each other, but no one spoke up.

After a few seconds, Buster broke the silence. "_What if we took the Gummi Ship? Plucky and Porky said it was finally ready."_

_Bugs kept an eye on the approaching Heartless. "Yeah, that's the best option." He turned towards them. "Let's go!"_

_They moved down the hallway as fast as we could, sprinting down towards the hanger. Everyone felt winded, but they couldn't stop, not with those monsters behind them._

_As they were passing the barracks, Porky came out, still in his pajamas. He yawned, still groggy from sleep. It was only until they were few feet away from them until he noticed them. He looked surprised to see them._

_"Hey guys? What's going on? I'm hearing these noises..."_

_Bugs grabbed him by his collar. "No time!"_

_They kept running, with Porky being dragged across the floor by his shirt, wondering what was going on._

_"Uh... Okay."_

_They were almost to the workshop, with the Heartless hot on their heels._

_Bugs glanced behind him and stopped short._

_There were hundreds of Heartless moving down the hallway, swarming all over the floors, walls... Just everywhere._

_There was no way they could launch in time. The only way they could make it is if someone bought some more._

_And he had a good idea of who **that** would be._

_When he looked back towards everyone else, he saw that they had made it the ship, and were getting on board. Buster and Babs stood at the ramp, waiting for him._

_He jogged up to them and gave them a sad smile._

_"You two go ahead. I'll guard the entrance while you guys get out of here."_

_Buster gave an indignant grunt._

_"Yeah right. I don't care if you're my King. I'm not leaving you."_

_Babs piped up. "And Lo would kill us if we left you. So we're staying until you get on."_

_He gave both of them a hard stare. They glared back even harder. He wasn't getting anywhere with intimidation..._

_Bugs sighed. "Fine. here's what we're going to do."_

_Reaching out suddenly, he grabbed both of them, knocked their heads together, and threw them up the ramp, kicking it shut._

_"You two, take care of everyone else, alright? I'll be fine."_

_He laughed, then turned towards the Heartless. He gripped his blade tightly. Made a wish for good luck._

_"And tell Lo I love her."_

_Lola never heard the **clunk** of the ramp as it shut. She was too busy getting the ship off the ground. The console did show that it was shut, and when she saw that, she thought that meant that everyone was on board. _

_She turned towards Plucky and Porky._

_"How much longer?"_

_They glanced towards her._

_"4 minutes."_

_She never looked out the viewport either, to see Bugs fighting to get them those 4 minutes._

_Bugs swung, again and again. If his arm got tired, he would just use magic._

_But no matter how many went down, more kept coming._

_"C'mon! You want some action? It's right here!"_

_He slowly took more steps back as they came closer._

_"Maroons! Nimrods!"_

_He didn't know if he offended them or not, but it seemed like an even bigger one was coming up towards him, **fast.**_

_"Oh, just great!"_

_He waited until it got closer, saving his strength._

_He swung at this new one, but it didn't even slow it down. It just rammed into him at full speed, and Bugs suddenly found himself flying. Even though it was a bad situation, he still found humor in it._

_"Heh, just like Daff..."_

_It was the last thing he said before he slammed into the wall, and felt something break. **A lot of somethings**._

_He glanced over, and saw the ship lift off, point towards the sky, and fly away._

_"safe and sound..."_

_He saw the beast turn towards him, and then he blacked out._


	4. Chapter 4

The creature moved towards Bugs' body, covered in rubble from the hard impact with the wall.

It tentatively prodded the body. Once. Twice.

Then it reared up to strike the killing blow.

Fire flashed out of nowhere, and struck it head on. It lurched back, screaming.

Daffy walked out the shadows, with Mickey Mouse right beside him.

Mickey glanced at Daffy."You could have called me sooner. We could have avoided this."

Daffy nudged Bugs, who didn't move. " I don't care, rat. All I know is that my best friend's hurt and I need your help." Daff shot the mouse a baleful glare. "Or do you want to go back to your kingdom right now? Like you ever did anything helpful for us, _Majesty._"

Mickey waved Phoenix Down over Bugs, and turned towards Daffy. "We need ta work together, Daffy. I know I'm not your King, but I am a friend of Bugs. I care about him as much as you. Otherwise I wouldn't have responded so quickly."

While everyone else had gotten on the Gummi ship, Daffy had slipped away to a certain part of the castle. Within a certain room, there was a link between the universes: specifically, it was a link between Bugs' and Mickey's castle, just in case something like this ever happened.

Bugs stirred, and they both rushed to his side.

"Ow. That hit really rung my bell. Thanks, Daff." Bugs stretched his arm, flexed his fingers. He shook his head, and reached for Wolpertinger. He looked behind him, saw the broken statue. "Oh. So _**that's**_ what broke."

Then he noticed Mickey.

Bugs gave him an unconcerned look."Oh. You brought some help." Mickey was fishing for a reply to say when Bugs broke into a big smile. Reaching out, he gave Mickey a hug. "How ya been, Big Brother? Been meaning to write."

Mickey laughed. "Hey Bugsy." After they broke the hug, his face turned serious. "We can talk later, little brother. Right now, we need to get out of here."

Bugs nodded. " Right, Will. I'll take the lead." Swinging Wolpertinger onto his back, he ambled forward. "Always got ta have a Plan C."

He saw something shift out of the corner of his eye.

The Heartless that had knocked him out earlier was still kicking, and even angrier.

"What's up, Doc?"

It roared in response.

Daffy and Mickey rushed to his side.

Bugs smiled. "No need, fellas." He lazily pointed his hand towards the monster. "Didn't want to do this, but..." It rushed towards Bugs again.

"_**Death**_."

There was a bright red light, and the Heartless disappeared.

Bugs kept walking, while Daffy and Mickey were stunned by what they just saw.

Daffy ran to catch up to Bugs. " You could have done that the WHOLE TIME? Why'd did you wait 'till now?"

Bugs shrugged. " I didn't feel like it."

Daffy shot him a hate-filled glare. "You're despicable."


	5. Chapter 5

The sun was just beginning to set as Bugs, Mickey, and Daffy warily walked through the castle.

At least, what was left of it. Those monsters had destroyed pretty much everything in sight, although they seemed to have disappeared, for the moment.

Bugs paused to examine the broken doors to the throne room, and shook his head sadly. "This was my home. _**Our**_ home. It was supposed to be a happy place, now it's..." He shook his head again, and kept walking.

Daffy glanced back at him.

"So, _your Royal Hareness,_ where are we going anyway? Got another ship stashed somewhere?" He rubbed his beak thoughtfully. "We _**could**_ just hide out in Mickey's place until this cools down..."

Mickey shook his head. "No. Not since last time. You almost burned the castle down, remember?"

Bugs had to restrain himself from choking him.

"So you wanna leave everything behind, let it all go to waste? **Fine**. Go with Mick, I'll figure out what's going on by myself." He pushed past Daffy, and broke in a run.

"Keep up if you're gonna help!"

Daffy _almost_ turned the other way, then he remembered what would happen when he came back.

He gulped, and ran to catch up.

Mickey was already a few steps ahead of him.

Bugs ran through the plan again in his head: They would get to the other ship, meet up with Lo, figure out what was going on, and put a stop to it.

He reached the corner. "Just gotta get through this last hallway...", he muttered.

He stopped when he heard singing.

_"Oh, to see my heart's desire,_

_Just one more time,_

_Would make me feel,_

_So nice and fine."_

He stood still, shocked.

_It can't be her, it can't be._ He thought bleakly. _She was exiled..._

He moved forward, and came face to face with the last person he'd ever want to see.

His old girl, Honey Bunny.

"Hello, Honey."

She beamed at him, smiling from ear to ear.

"Bugsy! I've been looking for you! Sorry about the mess, my pets can get a little, _heh, rambunctious,_ sometimes." She walked in circles around him, talking all the while.

"They didn't hurt you, did they? They were only supposed to hurt everyone else, especially that girl you've been seeing. She stole you from me, love, and you know I had to get rid of her to get everything back to normal. It hurt me_ so much_ when you kicked me out, just for trying to save our love."

Bugs glanced at her, and he could tell from her clothes that she had changed. All black, with a hood. No frills or jewelry, which for her was saying a lot.

But it wasn't just that; she felt wrong too. Twisted.

"They knocked me up once or twice. And they wrecked the castle." He folded his arms. "What have you done since you left? Where'd you get these... monsters from?"

Honey stopped in front of him. Waved her finger in his face.

"That's for me to know, and you to never find out."

She glanced past his shoulder.

"But..." She raised her hand.

Bugs turned around, and saw the hallway get blocked off with some kind of shield. Mickey and Daffy were on the other side, dumbfounded.

"We still have some things to discuss." She smiled cruelly.

Bugs slid Wolpertinger off his back, and got into a fighting stance.

"No way, doll. I'm done with you."

She sighed. "I guess we'll just have to do this the hard way then..."

Bugs saw a flash of metal, and barely managed to get out of the way in time.

Honey hefted her own Keyblade, and it looked like she knew how to use it.

Her eyes glowed, full of malice.

_"Time to see what you're made of, lover-boy!"_


	6. Chapter 6

Bugs knew not to waste time. He sprinted forward, trying to get a hit in and end the fight before it could get serious.

_Honey shouldn't be that tough_, he thought. _I only taught her the basics..._

He saw a blur, and found himself flying.

_Or maybe she learned some new moves..._

He hit the wall, bounced, and quickly recovered. He saw Honey staring back at him, waiting for him to try again.

Mickey and Daffy looked anxiously between the two of them, barred from interfering.

"Nice try, Bugsy. You can't beat me, you know. Might as well give in and let Lola go."

He scoffed. "Like I would ever give up her for you. She's a better person that you ever will be." He sprinted forward.

"And you'll **never** come close to hurting her ever again."

She just laughed. " We'll see, won't we?" She raised her blade.

"She _might_ be in some trouble right about now..."

_10 minutes earlier..._

Lola breathed a sigh of relief. Now we can figure out what's going on, she thought. I'm sure if we got Mick, we could figure out a solution faster...

She glanced at her outfit. Might want to change into something more appropriate for a fight...

She stepped out of the cockpit and into the hallway, heading towards her room on the ship, when she noticed Buster and Babs slumped over near the boarding ramp.

_What...?_

She ran up to them and tapped Buster on the shoulder.

"Buster! Hey, Buster! What happened? Did those monsters..." She glanced around.

"Where's..."

Buster began to stir, and Lola hoped that he had a good answer to her questions.

Buster's head was throbbing.

"Ugh, why'd he have to hit us so _hard?_ We were just following orders..."

Then he opened his eyes, and saw the last person he wanted to see right now.

"Er... Hello, Majesty. Just takin' a nap." He patted Babs, who was still unconscious, on the shoulder. "Guard duty can be real draining sometimes, you know. You and the King can be a real hassle." He saw the look and Lola's face, and tried to reassure her. "Bugs is fine, by the way. Totally fine."

"WHERE...IS...HE?"

He gulped.

_Don't look into her eyes._

"Uh... He um, kind of... stayed behind?" He cringed.

_Look at the floor. Not at her eyes._

"WHAT?"

_Just don't look into her eyes._

"He wanted to buy us some time. See, those monsters were right on our tail, and he wouldn't get on when we told him too, so he knocked us out, threw us in here, and... well, saved our skins, I guess."

He glanced up, and immediately regretted it.

If looks could kill, Buster would be one skinned rabbit.

Lola turned back around.

"We're going back. NOW."

He saw her stomp back down the hallway, and breathed a sigh of relief. They were going back for Bugs, and the Queen had a nice new Keyblade too.

He folded his arms behind his head, and glanced towards Babs.

"Maybe now we can lay off the guard duty, huh Babsy? Finally finish our training."

She didn't answer, still being unconscious, of course.

Buster shrugged. "Fine, be like that. When I save Bugs, _I'm_ gonna get all the attention, so don't complain."

If Babs was gonna reply, Buster wouldn't be able to hear it. Not with him fighting off the monster that snuck up behind him.

_That IDIOT,_ thought Lola. _Staying behind, acting like the hero..._

She stopped.

_If he got hurt... NO, don't say that..._

She started running back to the cockpit.

And almost ran straight into one of those monsters.

She almost screamed, and she frantically reached for a weapon. Then she remembered the Keyblade. She hefted it, and sliced the thing in two before it could take a step.

She ran into the cockpit, and saw Porky and plucky fighting off more of those things. She rushed into the fracas, shouting orders.

"You two, take us back to the castle! Bugs needs our help; I'll hold these things off, just fly!"

She killed the last of them, and turned back towards the hallway.

"Hopefully, there's not that many..."

The wave of monsters flooding in proved her wrong.

She got into a fighting stance. "This'll be fun..."

Bugs slashed again, and Honey blocked him. Every swing he made, she would reflect, and nothing seemed to break through.

He broke off the attack for a second, trying to buy some time to think of a new plan.

"What are those things you brought with you? Those monsters?"

She laughed. "The Heartless, you mean? A gift, along with these...," she pointed towards the Keyblade and robe, "from my new master. One who understands my problems."

She raised the blade, and pointed it at his heart.

"I have enough power to fight you now, and _win_. Although if that girl were here, I'd end her first and..."

She was interrupted by the Gummi Ship crashing through the castle wall, landing a few feet away from them.

Honey smiled as the ramp came down.

"Well well, looks like _today's_ my lucky day..."

Lola stepped out of the ship, weapon drawn and ready to fight. Babs and Buster were right behind her.

She saw Bugs first, covered in cuts, but still standing. She couldn't tell if she was more angry or happy.

Then she saw Honey, and _that_ feeling was definitely anger.

"_**YOU**_ did this? Hurt my family, all for some petty revenge ?"

She sprinted forward.

"Well, if you want it so badly, come and get it!"

Honey's face was covered in the biggest smile, and she eagerly ran to meet her.

"_With pleasure!"_

Their blades crossed, and the fight raged on.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Bugs tried to watch what was going on, but the two of them were moving too fast to follow. Buster and Babs stood next to him, waiting for a chance to help.

He could definitely hear the shouting though.

"Here's your chance, traitor! Why haven't you hit me yet?" Lola, definitely.

He heard laughing from Honey. " Just waiting for you to get tired, _girlie_. One hit and you're _done_!"

They broke apart to catch their breath.

Bugs and the rest rushed to Lola's side, weapons drawn. Bugs stepped forward, glaring at Honey.

"Give up, already. It's 4 against 1 Hon, you'll die if ya keep fightin'." He shook his head. "Stop now, or this'll end badly for ya."

Honey wasn't even looking at him, but rather, at Lola.

"All I want is her head, Bugsy. And your love. Is that so hard to give up?"

Buster and Babs stepped in front of Lola protectively.

Buster spoke up. "No way, traitor. I'd rather die than let you touch her." Babs nodded in agreement. "And we'd never let you lead us anyway! You're no Queen, and never will be!"

Honey shifted her gaze towards the two young ones this time. "You two... Why do you fight for them? What have they ever done for you? Wouldn't you want to lead an easier life, free from duty and obligation?" She motioned her hand towards Bugs. "You call him King, and Master, but why? Does he really deserve to teach two of your power? With me, you could have so much more!"

Buster and Babs only raised their weapons in response. "Yeah, right."

Bugs slashed at her face, and only barely missed. He could see her look of surprise.

"Don't you _ever_ try to manipulate my family."

He rushed forward, slashing rapidly. "And you won't get another chance to, either."

She snarled, and Bugs saw fire flash in front of his eyes.

_Trying to fight one person can't be that hard, can it?_ thought Lola._ Although she has changed._

She, Buster, and Babs rushed forward to help, and tried to break through Honey's guard. She seemed to be able counter everything they threw at her though.

Buster and Babs tried to take her flanks, but she would jump away. Bugs would attack her front, but the pommel would absorb his blows.

_Guess the only place left is the back... _She smiled. _Same way she tried to kill me, too. Ironic._

She got behind Honey, waiting for the right moment, and managed to land a deep cut.

Honey screamed, and everyone was pushed away. Bugs and the rest hit the ground hard, and didn't move.

"NO! DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH ME!"

Her body distorted, became more shadowy. Her eyes glowed under her hood.

"Enough! She dies now!"

Tendrils radiated out from her, and encircled Lola, still stunned from the immense force.

Lola felt her throat tighten, the air being pushed out her lungs. She hung in the air, helpless and barely conscious.

Honey loped forward, stopped in front of her, and raised her blade.

"Finally! I get to see you die by my hand! After all these years...!"

She swung the blade down, and all Lola saw was metal.

Honey swung the blade down, and it was about to connect, when she felt herself being dragged backward.

"What..?"

She felt a hand on her throat, and a voice in her ear.

"_Don't. You. __**Dare**__._" Bugs was back up, and he wasn't happy.

She was tossed to the ground, and pain wracked her body as she was pummeled with blows. SHe felt her shoulder break as Wolpertinger connected, and she screamed again. But Bugs wasn't going to show mercy.

He slashed again and again. He didn't care if she died, all he knew was that she tried to kill his wife. Again.

The only reason he stopped was to catch his breath. Seeing Honey wasn't going anywhere, he glanced towards Lola, crumpled on the floor. He ran over to her, and felt for a pulse. He sighed when he found a strong heartbeat.

By the time he turned to look back at Honey, Buster and Babs had her arms locked behind her back. She was still screaming, and one of her arms pointed in an odd direction.

He stepped in front of her, Keyblade in hand. He shook his head, overcome by both disgust and pity at the sniveling form in front of him.

"You deserve ta _die_ for what you've done, exile." His voice was harsh this time, with no hint of its usual playfulness. "The only reason you're still breathing is because I want **Lola** ta do it."

He motioned Buster to go wake Lola, and as he walked over, Honey saw her chance. Before Bugs could react, she bashed Babs with her shoulder, leaped back, and quickly turned, opening a black portal. She cackled as she stepped through, and the portal shut. The barrier separating them from Daffy and Mickey dissipated, and they rushed forward.

Daffy ran to where she had vanished."Come back and fight, you witch! Only cowards run!"

Bugs was shocked, but the sound of Lola stirring brought his mind to more pressing matters. _Deal with her later. Someone's hurt, help them first._

He picked Lola up, and carried her to the Gummi ship, padding softly up the ramp. Everyone else walked up the ramp with him, hoping that _someone_ would come up with a plan.


End file.
